JOHNNY ENGLISH

Johnny English is an agent with MI-7.

He is one of their best, revered by his colleagues, desired by women everywhere, cool and suave and incredibly collected, able to take on any challenge and come out of it with a win no matter what the opposition is.

This is all in his dreams, of course, and in the case of the first adventure we 'see' him on, literally that.

In reality, English sits at a desk. He puts together intelligence packets real field agents use to prepare for real missions while he stays safe in his chair and can only think about the wondrous things he would do, if only. Luckily for the intelligence communities around the world, English had never been allowed to venture into the field so those days had never come.

Until they do. And English is finally able to show just how good he really is. Which is not very much, actually. If there were two buttons to push which could each do something good, English would find a way to break both, or find a third 'bad' button, or misunderstand the situation and not push anything.

But he would goof up with considerable style, looking incredibly dashing in his tuxedo even as things fall down around him, usually through something he did wrong. And look positively angelic and blameless when the dust settles.

English is in his mid 40's when we first encounter him and he will age a few years over the course of his adventures but his ability to mess up and still hide that fact so well will stay as good as ever. And the impossible luck he possesses, not least of all the ability to stay alive, continues. Not to mention that wonderfully insane fact that he can and does get the girl at the end.

There is something endearing and cringe-worthy about Johnny English. He wants to much to be the kind of agent he is not and when he messes up, as you know he will over and over, he kinda sweeps the oops under the rug and moves on to the next likely mistake. But he is so sweet and huggable doing it that I find myself hoping that this next time maybe, just maybe, he will succeed and prove himself to be a truly good agent. But, of course, not so much.

I have to take English in small doses so watching on my computer 20 minutes at a time is better than in a theater for the full showing. I can take in a scene, cringe when needed and chuckle when called for and then press stop knowing I can, and will, come back later for more mayhem.